I’ve been thinking about this a bit lately. My first memory of a teacher comes from the lessons that I should always do my best and that the more we put into life, the more we tend to get back.
Not always immediately. Not always in the way we expected. But generosity of time, experience, knowledge, encouragement and even vulnerability — has a habit of creating something in return. These small acts of generosity can also inspire personal growth and everyday wellbeing.
Given the perception might be as an investor and entrepreneur I should use hard numbers to make good data grounded decisions. I work hard to find time to stay connected to my gut, to allow serendipity in and to continue to be uncomfortable in the places I put myself.
I am lucky enough to sometimes be asked to speak on a panel and sometimes I moderate. A while ago I got bored of myself and stopped taking paid speaking gigs. Very recently I was asked to be the lead on a panel for a group of very different characters and speakers – for Eat Nourish Love. I asked the speakers to approach the conversation with the room we were due to have slightly differently.
Not with “Look what I’ve done.” (Indeed I asked the audience to Google that after should they be inclined.) But with "Look what might still be possible for you.”
Google can give us some of the facts. AI can give us the background. LinkedIn can give us the highlights. What those of us have a duty to do is to story tell, to energise and to share with humility the scars and moments along the way that might ignite a flame in someone else.
If we’re standing in front of a room of people, why simply give them more information they could have found themselves? Give them something they couldn’t Google.
The big decision you agonised over.
The wrong turn. Or perhaps the start in life that suggests early grit might form later times’ priceless resilience as is often the case in enterprise.
Share perhaps one BIG thing that failed. The conversation you wish you’d had sooner. The doubt behind the success – indeed people make lots of assumptions about what might be perceived as success. For me, success is a healthy, capable family that extracts as much as it can from life whilst putting it back in and engaging others to do the same.
Why not share the lesson you only learned the hard way? And, importantly, one thing someone could actually do differently tomorrow. There must be a take away, Actionable something, a conversation to have, a self-challenge to overcome, perhaps a small starting triumph to do something you have always wanted to do.
I asked these speakers to leave the polished stories at the door. I believe the messy bits are often where the real value lies. Alas I lead the panel badly and did not get enough of this out into the room… they delivered, they generously shared but I know I could have delved deeper.
They were generous with their experience, curious about each other and, importantly we kept coming back to one question: “What does this mean for the person sitting in the audience?”
I am living as a gap year student, not exactly homeless but we sold the Manor 30 months ago so we did not feel bound by our big home. I have not missed the manor, I have not stopped working, but I have seen 43 states of the USA and learnt the diversity of the country. 67 Airbnbs and only one disaster stay. I wonder what people in our audience might do differently since they turned up to consider their next days? I hope some of it is put back in? We need volunteers to teach swimming (over 25% of children in GB no longer have the chance to learn swimming?). We need volunteers more than ever whatever your interests.
We all serve our industries for different reasons. We have different expertise, ambitions and platforms. We all have some level of experience to share and to help others with connections and networks.
Perhaps there is a simple opportunity for all of us when we are invited to speak:
Don’t use the stage to demonstrate what you know. Use it to unlock something in someone else. That, to me, is Give to Get. The best measure of a great conversation isn’t what people remember about the speaker… but what they go away and do differently.
I should mention here that I never give a speech without doing some selling in / touchpoint on our companies and investments… This time to launch the Wellbeing Booster box – year round value to keep people uplifted and looking onwards and upwards whatever their lifestyle challenges. I have been astounded and thrilled at the results generated from the new cards I gave out to individuals in the room… The Scentered Wellbeing Box offers a collection of wellbeing favourites for everyday self-care and thoughtful gifting throughout the year.